i reclaim …

the flowery cliffs, climb with the girl
whose battleground is night,
when the watcher comes.

She shows me where stars gather,
re-marks Pegasus with Indian
summer palms; he is her favourite.

My girl prepares to face the entity astride
defiance bright with alchemy,
a firstblood stance packed with a vital strike.

I reclaim her courage to say no,
climb cliffs for flowers, to be difficult and wild.

unposted draft for a poetry challenge on Wild Poetry Forum;
they want an “i reclaim my inner child” type thing and i’m not really into that, not in public anyway *heh

8 thoughts on “i reclaim …

  1. punatik says:

    “the girl
    whose battleground is night,
    when the watcher comes.”

    Fantastic . It sets it all up.
    You , are on a roll. Please…keep ’em coming , if can. 🙂

    “My girl prepares to face the entity astride
    defiance bright with alchemy,”

    And …She’s an Alchemist ? I must meet her. Please give her my email addy. Would you?!?!?!

    As usual, you don’t need to change a thing.Brilliant !

    • Shell says:

      *ahem – i’ve been remiss in responding here! *eek! my apologies! memo to self : “sometimes telepathy isn’t enough*

      i’m thrilled that you loved this, Emilio!

      there’s a lot needed to make this poem better … it’s still chained to the challenge/structure that seeded it for a start …

      as a child there was a lot of natural magic around me (as for all of us, i’m sure) … some of it was frightening but that may have been a misperception …

      sometimes i challenged that entity, other times not and really i should have questioned it … maybe i did, who knows what we do beyond physical self? there was some kind of resolution though i won’t know what happened til i’m on the other side *heh

      here, i was primarily trying to invert the situation; others on Wild were writing all that healing the child business but i felt my inner child was streets ahead of my adult self and she could heal me rather than vice versa, if that makes sense?

      anyway, enough rambling, just wanted to say thankyouthankyouthankyou!

  2. Ken says:

    Yes, yes, yes!
    No change.
    Your brilliance still shines through.
    excellent work….

  3. noxalio says:

    regardless, it is a super piece!

    • Shell says:

      thank you noxalio! you’re a very fine writer so i’m going to allow myself a 2 second window of ego-boost that you enjoyed this …

      the poem could do with re-vision for it to really fly, imo .. but then i’m unlikely to actually do that …

      • noxalio says:

        Shell,

        you are
        a brilliant poet …

        and generous
        to me. thank you.

        btw – i toyed around
        trying to tweak this one
        a little (because
        you said you’d revise it)
        but, i invariably ended up
        preferring your original …

        so, there!

        noxy.

        • Shell says:

          noxy! oh my, now you made me squirm and blush … i really don’t think i’m that good but occasionally muse smiles and says “not so bad, lass” lol

          but aarrgghh! now you tease, noxy! what did you do with it? i need to see, all of it … please! this is how i learn … well, absorb … i need to absorb … *heh .. sounds kinda grisly put like that!

          btw, i’m not being generous to you *sigh … just saying it as is .. your art shines!

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