fox

His bohemian trail’s a shadow
courting early hours.
Elegant in frost and freedom,
moon’s wise-dog is lingering
insight, testing scent.
He knows I watch him circle
starlit thoughts between us,
that I glean his wake
for echoes of another world
beyond this hide in space.

 

and then this ~ beloved friend J reworked and out-fox’d me *smiles*

His bohemian shadow
courts the early morning
frost, my elegant freedom.

A mongrel moon lingers
in sight of testing scent,
alert to crescent starlight
thought between us.

I glean his waking echo
for other worldly space,
for us to hide.

 

8 thoughts on “fox

  1. Shell says:

    *chuckling crone-style …

    i do think there is magic in/at/of the soulheart of language … all too often in everyday life it’s on by-pass though … a past life recollection reminded me how i ended then, when i pushed magic wayyy beyond my ken … now i listen to fox medicine, the wind … and silence …

    your comments are delicious, Paul, and i’m delighted that you enjoy my writing .. i know many say such but when i say .. i totally Mean ..

    and ok i’m girlie enough to be blushing at your compliments as well … *grin

  2. Paul says:

    Because he has a dual nature, so together the two poems work, haha, I have figured out your magic but I still don’t know how it works, so clever that fox spirit,

  3. Paul says:

    I don’t know. I would say they are both absolutely beautiful incarnation of the fox spirit, absolute proof that possible to contain actual magic language. You are an amazing writer even your comments are like jewels.

  4. Shell says:

    Ario – I’m blushing happily here and over the moon that you enjoy my writing!

    Janet – I kind of like my own version too … ooo is that too ego-icky?? But then J’s version is so utterly charming how could i resist it? lol …

    Thank you for your wonderful comments!

  5. janetleigh says:

    Shell, it’s so hard for me to choose one over the other because both have their great lines. I prefer your original “moon’s wise-dog is lingering” and your original “echoes of another world
    beyond this hide in space,” for it’s freshness and how it feels in my mouth when I say it out loud. “Beyond this hide in space” is really unique. I prefer that over “echo
    for other worldly space,
    for us to hide,” because it makes for a weak last line, IMHO.
    I like your unique word choices!

  6. Is it a guy type image? 🙂 Damn. My masculinity betrayed again.

    Hey, thank you for putting these poems up here 🙂 I enjoy my quiet moments here, just meditating on the images and their sing-song quality.

  7. Shell says:

    i’m smiling here because you’ve found exactly the same as i ..

    maybe i should try and merge them but i’m deeply fond of each/both as they are … since it was seeing two foxes that set this off, it seems right-er that they run alongside and unhindered …

    and isn’t “mongrel moon” such a guy type image? *grin* ..

    thank you, Ario, for your support here … ’tis much appreciated!

  8. Oh… which one to choose 🙂 I really love mongrel moon and I glean his waking echo in the second version, but miss this hide in space there, which is both tangible and intangible. Also, I liked he knows I watch him circle in the first version, which created a nice sense of tension.

    But as ever I enjoy the precision and elegance of your language, Shell.

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